Keto Diet – Metadork

Baby Got Back, Again

August 6, 2026 Journal

I’m pissed off.

There are other words for what I’m feeling right now. Disappointed. Discouraged. Defeated. Those are all true. But mostly, right now, I’m pissed off.

I stepped on the scale today and I’m back at the weight I was when I started this diet.

What the fuck?

I’ve been doing this for a while now. I’ve been logging everything I eat. I’ve been watching carbs like they are the literal plague. I’ve an app that tells me what I can eat, what I shouldn’t eat, how many carbs and calories I’ve consumed, and how much room I’ve left for the day.

Coming Back Around

August 4, 2026 Journal

Last night, after I shut down the computer, I just sat here for a while feeling defeated. I’d spent two weeks doing what I thought was everything right. I tracked everything I ate. I stayed away from bread, potatoes, sugar, and all the things people immediately associate with carbohydrates. Then I tested my ketones for the first time and… nothing.

According to that little strip of paper, I wasn’t in ketosis at all.

It felt like failure.

For a while, I sat here thinking that if I’d already failed, I may as well eat whatever I wanted. The temptation was immediate. I wanted pizza. Unfortunately (or perhaps fortunately) I didn’t have one in the freezer. What I did have was pasta. Bowties, specifically.

I’m A Keto Failure

August 3, 2026 Journal

For the last two weeks, I’ve been doing my best to follow a ketogenic diet. I haven’t approached it casually, either. I’ve been logging everything I eat in an app, weighing portions, checking nutrition labels, and making conscious decisions every time I sit down for a meal. The app even tells me whether a food is considered keto-friendly, and as far as I’ve been doing everything the right way.

The only thing I’ve been eating that even comes close to making me second-guess myself is the plain Greek yogurt I have for breakfast. Even then, it’s supposed to fit within my daily goals. Nothing about my meals has felt reckless or like “cheating.”